Paul Ince thinks footballers will soon be wearing skirts

Like former Manchester United teammate Roy Keane, Notts County manager Paul Ince has had enough for these modern footballers and their various wearable atrocities. After warning a group of snood-wearing hoodlums to get off his lawn, the 43-year-old launched into full-on rant mode.

From the BBC:

"Back in my time, and I sound old now, it was black and white boots and that was it," the Notts County boss told Midlands Late Kick Off.

"Now you've got snoods, people wearing headphones when they are doing interviews, which I find disrespectful, pink boots, green boots, you name it they've got it, tights - they'll be wearing skirts next."

Clearly that's the natural progression. Headphones, colored boots and accessories to help players keep warm lead directly to cross-dressing. They'll be trading lipstick instead of shirts after matches by the end of the season.

"You try to bring your kids up the right way and I think somewhere down the line managers have got to come together and say: 'Listen if you are doing interviews, you don't wear headphones, no hats, no silly stuff like that'. I don't think it's the way football should be played. We should all, as a managers' union, come together and stop all this. It's getting ridiculous I'm afraid."

OK, he's got a good point about the headphones and managers having to unite and take a more parental role in some cases. I agree with him there. But there are a few more pressing issues that managers should unite against first. A couple of which Ince inadvertantly touched on with that skirt comment.

"I'm sick and tired of seeing players, even when it's mild weather, wearing tights and these things [snoods] around their necks. It's not right.

"You see players coming off the buses with earphones around their ears. What ever happened to the art of conversation? You go into the changing room and they've all got their headphones on listening to their own bit of music. When I was at Inter Milan we used to have dinner together and talk together for two to three hours getting to know one another."

Ha! The art of conversation? Do you want them to churn their own butter, too? Maybe read Charles Dickens by candle light? This is 2011. People don't have dinner together and talk anymore. They eat a bowl of KFC while driving and type that news as grammatically incorrect as possible to their followers on Twitter as they do it. And then they go home and put on a skirt to match their tights and colored boots. 

UPDATE: Well, as commenter AlexS points out, Djibril Cisse actually proved Ince to be kind of correct by wearing a skirt to an awards ceremony in Greece last week. 

So, there's a footballer in a skirt the world has yet to implode. What now, Paul Ince?

Photos: Getty Images, Kickette

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